Something Missing

I am sitting with all these thoughts inside of me, I want to steer them away from me, but its hard to do.
There's a reason for feeling like something is missing in your life...
It's your heart, mind and body letting you know that you are not complete. You feel it as a lack of passion and sense of purpose.

Without natural passion and purpose you begin to feel empty. The activities you engage in seem to be little more than routines. You're on autopilot and not really present. Time goes by and you feel as if nothing of any real value is being accomplished in your life.

There are two categories of people who share the feeling that something is missing:
Category one: You have a wonderful husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend, kids, great friends and family relationships. Overall, life is good.
Category two: You don't have the kind of relationships, family interaction, friends or lifestyle that is right for you. Overall, life is not good. By the time you have become well entrenched into category two, you are so far from your genuine self that you may be in serious denial of your situation.
When I look at these factors I fall in category 2:

Whether you fall into category one or two, much of your time is spent going through the motions. You feel disconnected from your life and find yourself attempting to fill the emptiness you feel, with distractions.
You will do just about anything to kill or bury that lingering pain...The feeling that something is missing screams for your attention. The way you deal with it is to run away from it. You seek out relationships, things and experiences,which give you only temporary relief. Then you run again, looking for the next distraction. Only to find that it too was empty. You don't stop running until one day you finally hit the wall...
 I always seem to run away from something, looking for an exit.

I see myself in these text. I do it without realizing that I go from relationship to relationship to find out its not what I want. Just looking for  a quick fix to distract me from the real truth. The fact that its within me that I need to search. I've been searching from the far corners of the earth and still after five unsuccessful relationships later I'm still lost, nothing can fill me. I'm chasing after  a smile, happiness that I thought people could give me. But its not what anyone can do that can complete me, is the joy I need to seek within me. What's missing is ME.


You've been looking everywhere except the one place you will find the answer: Within yourself.
If you are a category one person, maybe everything in your life isn't exactly perfect but life is pretty good. You're a person who is stable, responsible and tries to make the right choices. Your life appears to be going in the right direction. Yet that pervasive feeling that something is missing haunts you day after day.
Both category one and two share one thing in common:
You feel that you are an observer rather than a participant in your life.
When you disconnected from your true self, you are going to feel as if something is missing because you are missing something... YOU!...And the passion that naturally comes with being your genuine self.
A life of appearances
Living a life in which you appear to be doing the right things is very different than living a life where you are actually doing what's right for you. They are not the same thing. Especially if what you're doing with your life is attempting to meet the expectations and standards of your family culture.
There is also the pressure of the larger world we live in.For many families, how they are perceived by the "outside world" may be more important than the needs and aspirations of the individual family members. This means a family culture may have a set of "ideals" which reflects how they want to be perceived by the rest of the world. These ideals are what largely determines what you believe your choices are: Everything from who you marry, to how many kids you have, where you live, the type of job you have and the church you go to.
Even if you managed to achieve each one of the "ideal standards" of your family culture, at the end of the day, you are surprised to find that you are not really happy ...Something is still missing.
The downside of family culture.
Family culture can often exert a pressure that sometimes has disastrous consequences: The relentless striving to be perfect or live up to some ideal, which is in conflict with your genuine self, can cause a severe emotional stress resulting in depression and even worse. Not feeling good enough or not quite living up to the expectations of your family culture puts you into conflict with your self. The problem is, you have more experience and rationale to back up your family's expectations.
On the other hand, you've had so little experience with the needs and wants of your genuine self that the internal struggle becomes one sided. All the reasons for the striving shift toward the side of your family culture. It's difficult to ignore those expectations, because of years and years of emotional and intellectual conditioning.So you are left with the feelings you have inside which cannot yet be expressed verbally or with a level of reasoning that can compete with the rationale that comes from years of family cultural "programming".
You have had so little experience living life and making decisions from your genuine self that you find yourself feeling indecisive ...Uncertain about your knowledge and abilities. In essence, you don't trust yourself.
You don't feel passion for anything because the feeling puts you in conflict with the cultural expectations. So you stop trusting the feeling ...Instead you learn to "motivate" yourself to engage in safe non-conflicting situations and relationships.

Motivation is not inspiration
There is nothing sustaining about motivation. Passion and inspiration are a source of sustaining energy which continue to increase over time until that which you have engaged in, manifests itself in your life. Passion has "follow through"... Motivation has "let down".The confusion between Passion and Motivation.
I often hear from people who tell me that they have passion in their lives but still feel as if something is missing...
My only response to this is that they do not have passion in their lives. If they did they would be fully immersed in the life journey that passion has led them to.
And their journey would not be plagued with indecision and self doubt! There is no feeling that something is missing when your life is moving in the right direction. Passion is the primary indicator that whatever you are doing is bringing you closer to fully realizing your genuine self. Therefore, passion does not fall short in supporting and providing whatever is necessary in your life for you to accomplish that relationship or situation which brings you closer to your true self.
My therapist have told this to me, and I do understand that what I was searching for isnt out there yes I can find love in every person I come across, but its not somebody that can complete me, it is what is missing within. I have searched and searched thinking all these relationships can distract me from what is already known, that I do feel most days like an empty vessel walking around this earth, i first thought if i follow my heart and accept God inside of my heart and soul, I will feel complete, but even after that I still dont feel connected to that thing I am longing for, its within me.
For many people, it is how they define passion that creates confusion.
For me, passion sustains the energy necessary, supports the confidence necessary, provides the knowingness necessary, and allows you to recognize the opportunities necessary to take the next great adventure in your life.


 When you live on earth, you will sense a disconnection from God, where you feel he is far away. This disconnect leaves a hole in your heart that nothing else can fill. A lot of people look for ways to fill that hole, but they look in the wrong places. Why? Because they don’t know they should be looking for God. In today’s verse, Job described it as being like someone lost in the desert searching for water.
When you have passion in your life you are not running away from yourself.
You are taking a journey into yourself.
Feel like something is missing in your life? Just close your eyes and step inside.

The day you run out of excuses
is the day your life changes...